Do you enjoy pain? Does the thought of hot iron blistering your flesh send shivers of excitement up and down your spine? If so, then we have just the thing for you here at ASMA. ASMA- the Association for Sado-Masochism in America is looking for sick minds like yours to fill its desks and shelves….
Author: admin
SPECIAL! ABORTED FETUSES!
We got tons of these. 1.5 million per year and growing! get yours today! They look so real. That’s because they are! Real dead human fetuses! great fun at parties! Coming soon, Fetus on a Rope! The fun never ends with dead fetuses!
Wanted to Rent
SWM,NS Professional, need apmt 10/1, sublet will do, must allow pets-I have a small boy, (neutered) $950 or less. Call after 7pm 482-555-2314
Reader Response
On 10/13/1998, you wrote: this is the biggest pile of appropriated blather i have had the misfortune to come across, once again the white bread cannibal culture strikes again this site has nothing to do with graffitti, yet you vultures just glomed a word that has a distinct cultural identity so that hopefully it would…
How’s This For a Millenium Bug?
BackgroundApril 24, 1998: Y2K problems arise from computer programs (hardware and/or software) using two digits to represent the year instead of four or more. Thus, when going from the year 1999 to the year 2000, the computer is actually going from 99 to 00. Comparisons then made between the dates, which expect the date value…
The Thunder of the Oranges
Back in the Trefrescios Period, giant Oranges ruled the Earth. Herds of hundreds of thousands of Oranges, Tangerines, and Nectarines roamed the planes looking for fertile ground on which to lay their eggs. To the much smaller, eight-foot long cockroaches living in beach-front condos, it sounded just like thunder. The cockroaches’ lives were pretty quiet,…
Puffer Mice?
The following are excerpts from “Building a Better Mouse”, printed for the first time in Sept of 1993. …The main concern was that so many individuals have been working to build a better mousetrap that we here at ASAP became very concerned for the future of the mouse. As if the common mouse doesn’t have…
Microsoft Closes its Doors
March 30, 1998 Microsoft Corporation announced today that it is closing down its operations permanently, including all of its operating system and application groups, support, and development. Bill Gates issued the following statement through his lawyers: “With the introduction of the Power Mac G3 from Apple, We simply don’t see a requirement in the market…
Chocolate Murmurs
Then the men came with their chocolate and their dark words. They spoke of the end, the shoe, everything. We were scared. One of us, Arnold, tried on some pizza puffs. He hadn’t had a very long day, so we humored him. The men were not amused. We asked them about our indigenous plants. We…
Weather
“And here’s the long-range weather forecast for our area from the Channel 6 weather computer: Monday expect temperatures to take a little drop into the high ‘teens as that cold front moves in. Of course it will be even colder by the lake, but only into the low ‘teens. Tuesday will stay in the high…