- Maybe Dairy Queen needs C++ programmers. “We’d like an object-oriented brazier interface”
- Never try to teach a pig to dance. (the pig’ll get mad, and
you’ll end up seeing parts of the pig you’ll wish you hadn’t)
- My brain makes funny squishy sounds when I walk.
- This brain for rent.
- My brain can write, unfortunately it cannot hold a pen.
- I’m tired of this can we talk about something else?
- I don’t write messy.
- This is what is known in the animal kingdom as ‘frantic’.
- Let’s kill him and take his skin.
- I wasn’t sleeping.
- you’re confusing me with someone who has a life.
- well, I never say anything.
- The human race as a whole is incredibly stupid, but it is only at the individual level that you begin to see just how mind-numbingly idiotic people really are.
- In general, you’re not supposed to suck on anything that hard.
- Normal, IL; now there’s a town that’s in denial.
- Don’t kill him, let me pick his pocket!
- shhh, my brain is trying to think!
- Honey, there’s no one whose opinion I value more than yours, except maybe my own
- I apologize for interrupting you, but I’m full of words at the moment…
- I tried lunch today, and it worked! Yeah, lunch!
- you’re between me and where I wanna be.
- Do you smell crunchberries?
- go suck a fish.
- And I woke up glazed and naked, surrounded by donuts.
- The smell of dried beetle husks…
- Squelch test, that’s when you squeeze someone until they stop talking.
- I just wish everyone would die, then I’d be happy
- Talkin funny isn’t illegal…yet.
- Can you help me release the hell behind my eyes?
Todd – Big dumb hole!
- I don’t know what I say!
- So, what’s yer point?
- Geez Louise!
- I’ll hurt you!
- remember how big my cherry was?
- that’s the pole I get off at.
- About a car: “It’s confusing; it’s like a corvette had sex with your car.”
- I like your gray hair; it makes you look extinguished.
Lizzie @3 yrs
- Well, my thumb isn’t bleeding red stuff all over me anymore.
- Daddy, I love you to go to work!
- I have another one [Band-aid] right here on my arm ankle [wrist]!
- I have to drink the water before it turns into blood.
- Mommy, what color is turtle blood?
- No Mama, I’m all out of words.
- I’m doing my job at my work, and you’re doing your job at your work. My job is playing.
- Daddy, can you shoo that bug away, it’s hurting my feelings.
- I have a map to show us the way. but it’s in my brain.
- in answer to “where is your little brother Luke?” He’s in my brain. He knows how to get in my brain.
- My tummy has a headache.
- Now can I please go to sleep?
- My little brother is a little bit shy so he’s hiding in my brain. I think he’s hiding in a bucket in my brain. [so he doesn’t get blood on him.]
- I keep the map in my brain so I don’t lose it. It’s ok if it gets blood on it.
- My shoes are waiting to go for a walk.
Lizzie @ 4
- My little brother is fake because I can’t find a real one.
- This doesn’t sound like water; it sounds like medicine.
- Daddy, how come strawberries don’t have brains?