Baby, you know I love you more than anything. You know that I would go anywhere, do anything, and spend whatever I have to make you happy, but I have got to tell you that my junk does not like what we are doing right now.
My junk is not very particular, it will be happy doing any of a multitude of things. But riding horseback in swimming trunks is not one of the things my junk likes. It isn’t that horseback riding could not be enjoyed by my junk, it is just that the clothing I chose to wear because of the fact that it is so terribly hot, and also because we are going to the water park in an hour, is less than ideal for keeping my junk happy.
But rest assured, my junk will be happy again when this ride is over, and it will be even happier when we have arrived at the water park. Yes, my junk does indeed enjoy the cool water, especially on a blistering hot day such as today. That is as long as the water is not too cold; icy cold water is one of the very few things that my junk does not like. And around noon, when we take a break to eat at a restaurant, my junk will enjoy some dry clothing and the soft cushioned chairs they provide. I know that there are probably other reasons why they have such form fitting chairs, with such deep cushioning, and cool supple leather surfaces, but I can’t help but think they are there purely for the sake of pleasing my junk.
No baby, it isn’t all about my junk! Baby please don’t frown. You are number one in my life. My junk takes the rear seat when it comes to you and your hapiness. When you are unhappy, I think of nothing else but how I can restore that smile to your beautiful face. What can I do baby, to reassure you that nothing could be more important to me than you? Perhaps after dinner tonight, we can dance to your heart’s content. There’s that smile. That’s what I’m talking about.
It is only natural though, when you are happy, and I know that I have done all I can to make sure your needs are met, that my thoughts turn to the happiness of my junk. For one must also look after oneself. It would do no good to wait on your needs day and night, neglecting my own till I waste away and am no longer to show you the love I feel for you.
So baby, don’t worry when I talk about what my junk likes or doesn’t like; I am only making sure that I am ready to provide whatever you need, whenever you need it. Now that is the stuff my junk likes best.