10 Things Business School Doesn’t Teach

The Weekend contains no workdays. Instances of ‘Tomorrow’ used on a Friday will automatically get mapped to ‘Monday’.
A manager’s job is not to motivate. If you want to motivate, become a puppeteer.
Meetings, by definition, are not productive. Trying to get things done in a meeting is like trying to wash clothes with the kids still in them.
If you don’t hear from your subordinates every hour, it probably means they are WORKING!
Asking people how long a task will take is always more accurate than pulling numbers out of your butt.
A manager’s job is to remove obstacles so his workers can do their jobs. Workers won’t do their jobs = their fault, workers can’t do their jobs = manager’s fault.
Meetings are not critical! Scheduling meetings after 4pm, during lunch, or before 9am is what is known by everyone else as being a dick.
Scheduling more meetings to get a project back on schedule is like cutting your legs off so you can run faster.
“Let’s go do this together” may sound to a manager like a good way to emphasize the urgency of something, but in reality you’ve only succeeded in wasting time twice as fast as normal.
If a subordinate tells you a task will take 1 week, pestering him two days later to see if it is done yet, demonstrates your inability to manage even simple pieces of information. You should consider a career as a Wal-Mart greeter.

Stupidopolis