Today is not Leap Year. 2008 is a Leap Year. So stop calling today Leap Year.
Author: Erk
My First Death Threat
1/06/2002 On my way home this evening, I happened to be approaching a truck which was preparing to turn right. Being the calm safe driver that I am (snicker), I checked my rear view mirror, and seeing that it was clear, switched lanes. From out of nowhere, this kid in a little black car raced up to…
Making Millions!!
Do you want to become a millionaire? That’s a stupid question; that’s like asking if you want to breathe! Well, unless you are breathing white hot lava, the answer is “Yeah, dumbass!” Open any magazine, turn your television to any channel, and you will see millionaires, flaunting their wealth, teasing you with the attention it brings, and…
Lottery Ticket to Nowhere
Friday’s Mega Millions lottery drawing disappointed millions once again. “It’s never even anybody I know” complained losing ticket holder Amanda Hanson. “And I know like a hundred people.” Amanda Buys her ticket twice weekly for the Mega Millions drawing which has so far been nothing but a disappointment for her and her friends. “We won $12 once, but…
Coming Soon! 2009
It’s undeniable and unavoidable, and unlike March, it’s going to be nothing like anything you have ever seen before.
Valentine’s Day
When I was six, everyone in my grade school class wrote Valentine’s Day cards, and passed them out to every other student in class. Thus I was indoctrinated into a long and mysterious tradition. Every year, millions of people send cards, flowers, candies, and all manner of red and slinky gifts. But why? What truths…
Auto Insurance Woes
Have you ever felt as though you are dealing with a rebelious child when you talk to your auto insurance agent? If so, then you may enjoy this. A member of our family was involved in a fender bender last month. She was approaching a stop light, slowing down to turn right, when a pizza…
Two Sides of the Story
I found this to be quite enlightening. Local Man Persecuted Naperville, IL In a case of severe racism and human rights violation Mbando Ngipbtu was fined $600 yesterday and told he could no longer practice his deeply religious and culturally significant rituals. This outrageous act of hypocrisy has brought together several civil rights…
The Corporate Screw
It started out a lot like any other Monday with me luggung a pile of not quite late bills down to the mail box, and carrying a bunch of threatening notices with me to work so I can call and remind these assholes that I haven’t died/purchased land in Idaho/filed for bankruptcy/or whatever reason it…
Woman Ends Motherhood
8-20-98 LOS ANGELES- A San Jose mother killed her child tuesday when his demands on her time became too great. “I was just fed up with the way things were going, and this child was where I was wasting most of my time. I kept thinking ‘why do I put up with this? I mean…